Piña coladas and mayonnaise

Last week I got a tough phone call. My Aunt Nan was stopping her cancer treatment.

Last week I got a tough phone call. My Aunt Nan was stopping her cancer treatment. She was entering end-of-life hospice care.
 
So at 3:30 a.m. Saturday, I kissed my sleeping wife and kids. I boarded a plane for Washington, D.C., to say goodbye.
 
As I drove to the airport, a flood of happy memories came to me.
 
The time Aunt Nan and I drove to Key West and drank piña coladas next to wild chickens.
 
The time she taught me how to “bump” a volleyball, instilling a lifetime love of the sport.
 
The times she wrote hand-made birthday cards to me, my wife and my two kids. In my whole life, she never missed a birthday.

A homemade birthday card Aunt Nan sent to my son earlier this year.

 
I love my Aunt Nan.
 
But here’s the thing: our political views couldn’t be more different.
 
Case in point: As I walked into her apartment on Saturday morning, MSNBC was blaring in both the living room and bedroom.
 
The screen read, “New Report Shows Federal Inmates Paid Less than Minimum Wage.”
 
I’m still not even sure how to address that.
 
I walked over to her bed. I held her hand as she struggled to breathe. I cried.
 
I am going to miss this woman.
 
Because despite our dramatically different political differences, we were still very close.

Aunt Nan holding Rocky, and discussing toy horses with Fiona.

And it’s because we shared something more important than politics: love.
 
….
 
Earlier this year, media outlets were relentlessly attacking U.S. Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas and his wife. Even his close friends were turning on him.
 
But the most unlikely person came to his defense: Justice Sonia Sotomayor.
 
She said, “I have probably disagreed with [Justice Thomas] more than any other justice. And yet, Justice Thomas is the one justice in the building that literally knows every employee’s name. Every one of them. Not only does he know their names, but he remembers their family names and history. He is the first one who will say, ‘Is your son, OK?’ ‘How’s your daughter doing in college?’ He was the first person that sent me flowers when my step-father died.
 
“He is a man that cares deeply about the court as an institution. About the people who work there. But about people.”
 
I watched this clip in shock because Justices Sotomayor and Thomas are oil and water: They don’t mix.
 
Or at least, that is what we are led to believe.
 
Because the truth about oil and water can be found in a similarly unlikely place: a mayonnaise jar.
 
Turn over the back of a mayonnaise bottle. The first ingredient is oil. The second is water.
 
What do we know about mayonnaise? It’s mixed up, and stays that way.
 
The reason is the third ingredient. It’s the emulsifier: an egg.
 
An egg binds two ingredients together that couldn’t seem more different.
 
For Clarence Thomas and Sonia Sotomayor, love is the emulsifier.
 
For Republicans and Democrats, for conservatives and progressives, love is the emulsifier.
 
For my Aunt Nan and I, love is the emulsifier.
 
This morning I got a phone call at 4:30 a.m. My Aunt Nan said her goodbyes. Then she died.
 
As I cried, I smiled from the memories and Aunt Nan’s primary lesson: Love is stronger than any difference in this world.

P.S. Last year, I was reading the YouTube comments from a speech I gave to 1,500 free-market leaders in Orlando. The first comment: “Amazing speech. We need more of this.”
 
The username: NanJean. My aunt.